The Thing with Feathers: Holding On to Hope for a Cancer Cure

My daughter’s high school English class is reading a poem by Emily Dickinson. It begins with: “’Hope’ is the thing with feathers.”

I read the poem in high school, too. I’ll be honest, even with all of the English courses I took, I never fully understood what that line meant.

Since being diagnosed with follicular lymphoma, I think about hope a lot. Sometimes, I interpret that line as meaning that hope has feathers because it flies away easily, like a scared bird. As cancer patients, we all have moments when it’s hard to hold on to hope.

At other times, I believe that hope has feathers because it’s like a soft down pillow that gives me comfort.

It’s a balancing act. Hope is about staying positive about circumstances that might not happen. As cancer patients, we often discover good news about cancer that makes us want to grab that soft pillow of hope.

Last month, I saw a story shared on cancer message boards, Facebook groups, and in emails. The headlines were along the lines of, “Company Says It Will Cure Cancer Within a Year.”

Now, like any cancer patient, that line caught my attention.

But I’ve been a cancer patient for more than 11 years, so a part of me was also a little skeptical.

The original article starts with a quote from the head of a biotechnology company claiming that the new treatment, a cure for all cancers, could be offered within a year. The treatment would begin working right away, have minimal side effects, and be less expensive than current treatments.

Two parts of me were fighting inside: One wanted to believe in the fluffy hope pillow, while the other was sure this little hope bird was going to fly away.

I read further. The science behind the treatment sounded fantastic. But then I saw the kicker: This “miracle cure” hasn’t been tried on humans yet. It’s been tested on mice only. When the company says they plan to make it available within a year, they mean they intend to start clinical trials in that time. So, it won’t be available for anyone who wants or needs it within a year. And there is no guarantee that trials of the treatment, called MuTaTo (multi-target toxin), will be successful.

Experts expressed caution, too. In a post on the American Cancer Society’s website, Len Lichtenfeld, an oncologist and the society’s deputy chief medical officer, wrote: “… [W]e all share the aspirational hope that they are correct. Unfortunately, we must be aware that this is far from proven as an effective treatment for people with cancer, let alone a cure.”

New treatments take time to develop. The U.S. Food and Drug Administration recently announced it will grant priority review to a treatment for follicular lymphoma. I first wrote about that treatment on my blog in 2010. It took nine years to get to the point where its makers can apply for approval.

It’s hard to be that patient when you have cancer.

So, when I see news like this, I take that fluffy hope pillow and I rest my head. I try not to get too excited because if I’m not careful, the feathers might fly out as I slam my head down onto hard reality.

Keep holding on to hope.

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